无能为力。

前几天生了一场大病，到现在才稍微好了一些些。。
发高烧、感冒、咳嗽。。 全部都找上门来。
自己身体的温度高到连自己都怕了。
咳嗽到醒来了就无法再继续睡下去。
鼻子里面塞了全都是青黄色的液体。
超恶心。
超辛苦。

不过，更辛苦的是，
自己在病的时候，竟然没有人在身边体贴的照顾，
自己好像被遗弃一样。
辛苦。
堕落。
无助。

突然很想家。
生病时，他们比我更紧张。
硬拉我去看医生。因为自己超讨厌吃药。
睡觉时，她会帮我盖被单。
因为自己时常在半夜把被单给踢走了。
吃饭时，总会夹我喜欢吃的菜给我。
因为他们知道我很挑食。

在这里，没有人投靠。
唯有靠自己了。
很多事要烦，
我的心真的好累了。

请您饶了我，
放我一条生路，
好吗？

下雨天。。

下雨天了怎么办？ 我好想你。
不敢打给你 我找不到原因 。
什么失眠的声音 ，
变得好熟悉 。
沉默的场景， 做你的代替，
陪我听雨滴 。。


期待让人越来越沉迷 。
谁和我一样 ？
等不到他的谁 。
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味 。
一个人撑伞 ，一个人擦泪，
一个人好累 。


怎样的雨 ？怎样的夜？
怎样的我能让你更想念 ？
雨要多大 ？天要多黑 ？
才能够有你的体贴 。

其实没有我你分不清那些
彻别 接近还能多一些 。
别说你会难过 ，
别说你想改变 ，
被爱的人不用道歉。


这些字，彻彻底底的写出我现在的心情。
也许大家都没发现，
我现在的心情真的超差超烂，
也许是因为我的演技超好吧。。

无奈。
但，
我好想你。

爱。情

长大后，
总觉得爱情像个陷阱。
刚开始的时候，
一切都是完美的，
所有的时光，都是快乐的。
时间过了，
爱情也跟着褪色了。。
曾经的山盟海誓，最后也不过随风飘去。

当爱已成为往事，
当情已不在，
以前曾经经历过的一切都成为回忆。

可是，当你
试着不再去想他，
试着不再让他搞扎自己的生活，
试着自己一个人去欣赏美丽的风景时，
才发现，
原来，
自己也能一个人生活，
也可以活得精彩。

希望你能找到自己的目标，
别再为别人而活。

祝福你。

random post.

today is a holiday (hari nuzul al-Quran, i dont know whether spell correctly or not.) for few states in malaysia. err, i mean those ISLAMIC state like here. lol. but those lazy ppl who stays at non-holiday state like someone also will give themselves an offday today due to their laziness. :X and i tot today will be free abit due to holiday, but who knows.. shop lagi many customers. good also lah, not that boring mah hoh. and can earn money too. $_$

and pity me. i only ate 2 meals today. cirit-birit leh. babi j0ez, mali jaga aku please. :(

and kesian mr wong also. he kena chicken pox. sure gatal sini sana leh. i had it when i was 19 and i know that kind of itchy mia feeling but cant scratch. :( cannot kena angin, cannot eat this and that, cannot go here and there. KESIAN!! but nvm lah, people said we only had it once in our whole life. (dont know true or not) but still, hope you get well soon lah! take good care of yourself. nanti during bday hvnt cure then kantoi. stay at home celebrate with cicak and antu only. wuwu. :X

night folks.

random post with pizza. ;)

adoi.

since i came back (2nd) til now (16th), tak pernah lagi makan any fast food. kesian me hoh? :X tu la, dad said fast food not healthy la, oily la, ini la itu la, i also lazy leh mau makan later kena membebel free free. lol.

this afternoon been sms-ed wif my dad. knowing that mr Leong is going back to somewhere he belongs. (konon nyer.) and suddenly thought of this evil idea.. makan PIZZA! and hoh, pizza not consider as fast food mah, kan after we ordered then we need to sit there and wait for it and sometimes it takes quite some time to serve us the pizza. so it is not fast food. fast means you ordered, and you get it immediately. kan kan kan? YAY~~ :D

SO, we went to mall's pizza hut and ziao-ed pizza lur.. and i bring my little cousin, fuyi along.

this is cool lime chicken flavour. sedap giler.. :D

and this is the à la carte. OK LAH, i admit i ordered this bcos of that sotong rings only. :X

and this is my FAT dad with his tongkuhead. :x mr leong posing and kc talking to ah wei that time, scare to show his entau face here.


and this is my cute little cousin, fuyi with his deliciousie spa ga theeee :D he already give order that he wanted to go to pizza hut and eat this spaghetti when we were at the car park that time. Zz.

after that, tea session with cute cute alvin and cool eric ting and fish benny. :D

happy ending. night people.

unspoken words..

help. me. im. so. tired. and. i. cant. breathe.

everyday need to wake up at 8am. everyday need to go to the same shop to have breakfast. everyday need to be at shop. everyday everyday everyday.. the same.

sunday monday tuesday wednesday thursday saturday, even friday also the same. no off day. no relax. no rest. nothing.

now i know how tired and tough for them. now i know it is not easy to be them. now i know it is not easy to live. now i know it is no easy to earn something. now i know. finally know.

i hope it is not too late for me.

it's hard for me to tell them. it's hard to tell face to face. i hope to be brave enough to tell them that i love them, indeed. i heart them.

tears keep falling from eyes. i cant control. really heartache.. just want to tell them how much i care for them and sorry if i've made any mistakes.

tired. i better off to bed. night. *emo*

festivalicious..

argh, tolong! i'm so sleepieeeee..


this morning around 7am++ been waken up by a morning call from my cousin who just stay beside my house.. and she told me that my grandpa need to go to the hospital for medical check-ups. (grandpa is stayin with my family) and the funny thing is, she never call my numbers but she call dad's numbers and both of my peh and buh still sleeping til syok cos its waktu subuh and its cold outside and damn bloody warm to sleep under the blanket. SO, i need to walk into my parents' room and answered the call and open the door so that my grandpa can go with them. Zz.

around 9am+ and i started my journey to go to the hospital to "change shift" cos my aunty claimed that she needs to go back home to prepare the stuffs for "pai pai" and she hvnt do any single thing yet. Zz. i thought thing would be that easy.. i REALLY THOUGHT lah! mana tau, parking dah hard to find, need to pusing here and there for dont know how many rounds then end up park at beside white line there. AND itu clkknspkm mia guard come and halau me.. i was like, "wtf, so many cars park sini lu tarak halau tapi halau aku je!" and in my heart i cursed him 9696 altho i know it is their responsibility to do so lah. ( im not that bad la hoh? :P) then i need to park and sibeh far mia place and walk toward clinic there. clk.

and hoh, i thought (again) so simple lah go find grandpa and bring him and his things balik but the nurse there tell me that we need to wait for the blood report AWHILE only and this AWHILE takes about 2hours for us to wait there. Zz. waa piang er, i dah fall asleep there for few times dah but still not our turn yet. finally the board there shows our numbers and we've been asked to go into one of the room there. apa yang menyakitkan hati aku is that we go in the room and see the doctor tak sampai 10minutes terus diminta pergi ke farmasi to get his medicine dah. the doctor said grandpa's blood cantikkkkk, blood pressure cantikkkkk.. ala.. semua pon cantikk la, only my mood nia tak cantikkkk! clk. really crazieeee lah but there are still alot of ppl waiting for their turn tho and i think because this is general hospital and no need to pay any single $$ to get the specialist to look after the diseases and sickness. siapa tak mahu? -.- (for those who stayin in darul naim may know which hospital i'm referring to :X)

just follow papa and mama went back to my grandma's house (which is my dad's side) for reunion dinner. seriously i dont really feel like going back due to some reasons which i lazy to mention again and again. sighs. but still, the dinner was great and let me show you my all time favourite..

inilah "zhu tou tong" yang palinggggg sedapppppppppp sekaliiiiiiiiiiii ~~~ :D yum yum. orh, please dont be jealous ya. :X

anyway, i'm here to wish everyone HAPPY MID-AUTUMN FESTIVAL !! and enjoy your mo0ncakes ah!! :D and here is the new choices of mooncakes for year 2008 which i think it is quite cute and funny. take a look..

it is so cute isnt it? LOL. damn gerammmm leh feel like eating it.. :D

OK Lah, thats all. i go kaypoh with their tanglungs awhile la.

night everyone. *hugs*

lets start with nonsense.. :D

wOohOo~~ today is a new day for me (aiyah, just pretend it is la altho its not!) cos today kinda special for me mah. fyi, this is my new blog and i already deleted the previous one cos it was kinda messy and nothing special in the previous blogs also. (hohoho! :X)

new blog, new lifestyle, everything new. so please welcome a brand new me. (*laugh evilly!*)

and and.. not forgetting, my cute plus funny plus adorable plus handsome (he insists this! LOL.) but a LITTLE bit FAT punya daddy.. HAPPY 23rd birthday!! OK, let me show you my so-called daddy yah.. deng deng deng deng..

inilah daddy ku yang ku mention tadi.. LOL. act cute lah tuh. :X hopefully i wont get killed for mem-siasuey-kan dia. kakakaka. anyway, happy birthday (again) and hope your dreams come trueeee.. terutamanya can "one more floor" with that who who who lah kay? :D *winks!

just had dinner at behind pantai timur there.. chicken chop eh. yum yum.. :O its been a long time gua didnt go there and it still taste so niceeeeeeeeeeee.. woohooo. and here come the pictures..

This is jian and cha bor mia foodsss.. deliciousieeee :D and.. deng deng deng deng...

this is cha bor with her yum yum food~~~ :D and she really enjoyed it. YAY~~

OK lah, that's all for this post la. tired. ciaoz. *yawns*